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How shallow can I be? Very.

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Today, I finally noticed something. Actually, someone and some people. I'd like to make this post short so here is a list of things I noticed today at last. 1. Someone had been trying hard to get my attention since a few months ago. 2. Some gestures and talks are hard for me to understand, especially when they are shadowed by emojis. 3. If I don't make a step, I might not get something or someone. Simple. 4. I finally understand why some relationships couldn't connect. There is no spark. 5. We can casually talk about missing each other but there is always a thin line that separates the friendship boundary.  6. As a person who was given too much hints, I am on the shallow side. 7. As a person giving quite many hints, I am on the afraid-I-might-get-hurt side. 8. I used to catch up quickly but as I recently put on my ignorant attitude as a shield, I don't focus on complicated stuff. 9. I still haven't totally figured myself out. 10. My self esteem
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2 years later

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 I forgot how to write. I always wrote as if someone is reading. Now I know no one is reading, let me just pour it all out. I am so unsure of someone now. Is this the right person or am I being delusional?  My best friend keeps saying "Don't settle for less" but how do I know if it's less, enough or just what I needed? I pray hard so that if this is right, be close and if it isn't, stay far.  P/s: So casually cruel in the name of being honest.
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May was a total disaster

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In the period of one month, I sent two resignation letters to two different companies. Never have I ever dreamed of accepting an offer and letting it go as soon as three weeks. I never regret my decision. "I didn't leave a shithole to enter another," I monologued. The situation there was undescribable. Till now, I do not know how to explain what happened to me and how I was treated there. The details are now as blurry as my view during my teary drive back home from work. They even let me leave in less than 24 hours. Yes, I'm going to write that.  After I left, a few people still called me. They ranted to me about the issues they faced everyday and how people were sacked too. Of course, they deserved it. But I didn't pick up the latest call; I just think I've had enough and I don't want to hear it anymore. Anyway, I still need to write this down here so that I remember. I'm starting to forget it as June passes by. Also, some of the motivatio
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